Wednesday, March 13, 2013

WHY AM I TIED TO THE BED?

March 12, 2013

December 9: We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Shoveled for the first time in years and felt young again. This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 15: The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment.


December 20: Snow, lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but so happy we will have snow for Christmas!


December 23: Ice storm this morning. Fell on my butt on the ice in the driveway putting down salt.  Snowplow went by again...

December 24: 6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the creep who drives that snowplow.... I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling.

December 25: Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel.

January 10: Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

January 22: Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the stupid stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day.  Idiot snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying.

January 30: More snow. Got all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time I got undressed, pee’d and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel.

February 5: Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0.

February 18: Warmed up to 10 degrees. Still snowed in.

February 27: 10 more inches. Neighbor says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. How dumb does he think I am?

March 1: Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars for the bump on his head.  9" predicted.

March 10: Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

March 13: I feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?

If you made it this far through, thanks for visiting! Be sure to click on the interview tab at the top of the page to visit with this week's guest, Lecia, from Farmhouse Prims!  I'm so glad you stopped by!

~*~Lisa

8 comments:

NickelNook said...

LOL!! It sounds just like our winter up here in Saskatchewan! Perhaps I should get the name of your Doctor! ;o) Thanks for the laughs! Oh...I do hope that was your intent and I'm not offending you with my laughter!...Nancy :o)

sew.darn.quilt said...

Sounds like you have almost as much as we've had so far this winter, oh yes, we're looking at -25 by Sunday.
Keep taking those little "snow" white pills and enjoy :)

Primitive Stars said...

Oh ya, same here, snow and more snow, where oh where is Spring, a sign would be nice, Francine.

Norma Conway said...

Lisa, bless you, art friend, you made my day with this post. Hope all is well with you, I think of you often. Have a nice rest of the week, hugs, Norma, xo

Prims By The Water said...

I think I would have to kill that snow plow guy too Lisa. We had more snow today too...so ready to be out on the dock with a cold one enjoying the freighters going by...soon I hope...soon. Janice

Firecracker Kid said...

Oh Lisa, I've got those little white pills, lol! Our snow plow driver already got Tim. Just about blew him right off his tractor. He did blow Tim's glasses right off his face. Oh, and just missed the jogger. Yes, he was reported!
Hang in there babe, you'll break loose of that bed :)

Hugs~Carol

My Primitive Creations by Tonya said...

Lisa...thanks for the great laugh...awesome post! I guess all that shoveling turned into a blessing of a slim, Trim & in shape body...

Have a Great weekend!

Hugs
Tonya

Farmhouse prims said...

Wow Lisa, you have been hammered with snow, as I am writing this, we are getting snow, hopefully the last one, the robins are going to be all confused. hugs, Lecia